thoughts & more
They are so angry, so violent, so aggressive. You meet people in the streets, driving, walking, and they are so angry, so ready for violence.
I always try to tell myself that there is a reason for this, that I dont know what they have been through or what kind of day they are having, that maybe they are just so unhappy. But, then i think, why? Why are so many people so unhappy?
Are all of these people that I encounter so unhappy that it causes them to act like this?
Things can be so simple, so easy, so much less stressful, why do we make it worse?
I would actually love to live without it. At least for certain periods of time.
It's actually less about the internet, and more about technology, and what it has done to society.
At the dinner table - everyone is on their phone.
After dinner - everyone is watching TV or on their phone.
Long drives where you, the driver, would like someone to talk to - others in the car are on their phone.
You try to talk to someone while they are on their phone - good luck! They won't even hear you speaking!
This is something that really makes me want to take more than a few steps back and away from people, and society. Seeing how everyone is so addicted to their phones and social media is just awful for me.
I also have times where I am on my phone, maybe I'll play a game, talk to friends, read articles, but it doesn't consume me. I am not addicted to it. I don't spend hours on it. If someone talks to me, I put it down.
When I am with a partner, and they are on their phone and I mention something about it, only then do they put it down and then say "ok, what do we talk about?".
Verbal communication has been demolished by phones. Couples have difficult time having proper conversations with each other over lunch, or at any time.
I can go on about this, but the answer to the question is yes, gladly.
It's one thing to go on a journey of self-discovery, which can be very difficulty in itself, but actually accepting what you find throughout that journey, or at the end of it, can sometimes prove to be the hardest part. This is something that I feel many people don't take into consideration or don't realize, that at some point, they will be faced with some sort of clarity, and that this new piece of information about their identity may just need to be accepted.
I feel like I have been at this point as well, where I got to a place on my journey that I came to some very clear understandings, but, I kept searching for other answers, instead of accepting what was right in front of me.
The reason for this I do not know, maybe it's my sub-conscious not wanting to accept what I found, or maybe it's me being blind to the truth, maybe because it is too hard to consciously deal with.
Has anyone else ever felt this way?
I found that staying busy really helps take my mind of things, especially unwanted thoughts.
Meditation and mindfulness hasn't always worked for me, in these cases I tend to try to stay as busy as I can, just to not think about things.
I don't know how healthy this is, or if it's a good approach, but sometimes it's the only thing that helps.
Meditation and being mindful of every time your mind wanders off, to try and catch it and revert yourself, reverting your mind back to the present moment.
That is something that motivates me and that helps me through those worse times. The understanding that there will also be better times where I will be able to make a difference.
that i let my worries consume me and not sharing these too my loved ones. which then got worse and anxiety and depression set in going on for nearly a year, started to try numb the pain with alcohol and still did not want to be a burden. was the end of my relationship.
ive learnt that sharing your worries and asking for help are not weaknesses or burdens. numbing the pain makes it worse in the long run.
im holding on to hope of my ex relationship, as they say they still love me and maybe in a while. actions speak louder than words so need to let go for my own mental wellbeing
At times, I would desperately look for the path and try to find my way to achieve my goals. At other times, I would be exhausted and have no motivation, I would wait for the path to find me. And then there were times when I was just open to what ever happens.
Neither have gotten me far. Neither have helped me reach the path to my goals, to what I desire. It is as if nothing I do actually alters where I am. Even when big changes occur, I somehow get back to the same place I have always been in. Far from the path I desire to be on, and farther from the destination.
Thinking about this, letting it sink in and coming to yet another realization that this is how my life is, still is, as it has been for so many years, demotivates me to the point where it is difficult to even think about doing anything to change my life.
The lack of motivation is addicting. It causes me to sink into more and more, making it more difficult to find my way out.
I know that this should not stop me, but it does slow me down. The only thing I can do is to think of constants, and to try and gain motivation from that thought. To understand what thing I want to have in my life, regardless of where I am in it and if things continue to be the same. To fight through the lack of motivation, and from within it. To continue moving forward, even while being pulled back.
What are the things I want in life that I can achieve? Things that I want regardless of what ever may happen later on.
These are the constants that I am defining. These are the things that, even if my life continues the same as it has been until now, or even if it gets worse, I will have those things that bring me joy, happiness, and eventually motivation.
These are the constants that, no matter where I am, I want to have.