I didn't have a normal childhood with friends and family as others did, so I didn't learn from that early age how to socialize and be with other people.
I think it affects me to this day because I have a lot of difficulty socializing. Things that seem simple to others, such as making friends, keeping friends, talking, sharing things, understanding what to say and when, are mysteries to me.
I try, but usually I get things wrong.
While I do still work on this and try to improve, I have accepted it for what it is.
Being able to do something meaningful that will bring change to the world, as well as to my own life.
It wouldn't be a desk job or a 9 to 5 job, but something different, more open, one where i will have more freedom.
Yes, I believe that everyone is capable of changing themselves and others.
Of course, doing it is not as easy as it is to write it down.
Many times, the changes we bring may only be temporary, especially if they are changes in ourselves.
This is because we are so used to our habits, and just like creating new habits is a very difficult task for many, so is breaking old ones.
As much as we would like to change things about ourselves, it's just not always that simple. Sometimes, an enormous amount of motivation is required for the change to be a permanent one. otherwise, it could end up just being a phase. That is one reason why sometimes a big change will only come after a significant event, it's that event that gives the motivation to make the change permanent.
This may be different for everyone, and finding your own way to making change is key, and it may not be like anyone else's way for causing a change.
The skill other people have of being social. Of knowing what to say, how to say it, and actually being abe to say it, without it coming across as weird or wrong.
Basically, the people skills others have.
This includes just being able to talk and express themselves, something i have a lot of difficulties doing.
I like a little bit of both.
I find it difficult to live life only by a schedule, but, I also find it very difficult to live without having some sort of a plan.
I don't mind not knowing what city I will spend the night, but I do want to know that I will have a bed, or someplace to sleep, for example.
Life is more adventurous when we don't try to plan every part of it and just let things unfold as they go along.
But for me I start to feel as if I have lost control or am just not doing ok if I don't maintain a minimal level of planning ahead.
That i was following in the same steps as my family, doing the same exact things i always told myself i would not do.
Getting lost in my travels.
Unexpected things.
Changes.
New experiences.
Not as much as I should, but it's tough.
It's easy to say the correct things, or, at least the things you feel are correct.
Doing them though is a completely different story.
The forest.
Its calming, its the one place i can go to reduce stress.
Creating habits.
When I want to start something new, I always find it extremely difficult to make a habit out of what ever it is that I want to start doing.
If I want to start training with a workout program, I will either need someone to train with me because this will force me to actually do it since someone else is relying on me, or I will need someone else to write the training program because if I write it I wont mind not doing it, but if someone else went through the trouble of writing it for me, I would do it out of respect for that person.
